sometimes, just for fun, i think in a british accent

i have become quite the sitcom addict in the last week. made it through most of the fifth season of how i met your mother, the third season of californication (Oh my fucking god!), the fourth season of everybody loves raymond and the first season of nurse jackie. i think its another obtuse and pathetic way to feel connected to people. BUT all psychoanalysis aside, one of the characters on nurse jackie, who is a doctor said,
"when i was a little girl i took a butter knife and opened up a dead bunny to see how it worked. thats why im a doctor."

and voila, i realised why i've always wanted to be a damn surgeon. its not about fixing and healing and helping, its just crazy curiosity. nothing to do with power or good will, i just want to know how it all works!
and thats why i probably feel so enthusiastic about psychology. i want to know the mechanisms of our twisted little minds. the healing and repairing thing just comes with the package, i suppose.

its actually quite comforting to know im as selfish as the next son of a bitch. i dont think i could really be content doing something all my life for anyone else but me.
that does come off really wrong, but im just being honest.

anyway...
i saw Alice in Wonderland today (Tim Burton). quite UNenchanted if you ask me.
also i had coffee after ages. with three espresso shots, just felt i needed the boost. im still buzzing off it, a good three hours later but it doesnt make me feel too good. and it wont do anything nice for my sleep cycle which is massively fucked, if i may say so.
oh. well.

thats all i have for now, no canon worthy passages (still, damnit).

im beginning to think muses dont bloody well exist.